Are
there clearly identifiable ways that treatment of emotional/psychological
problems or relationship problems are different for the gay and lesbian
population as compared to the treatment of such problems in the heterosexual
population?
The basic principles of effective psychological
help are the same, but there can be significant differences. The importance of
these differences varies according to the life experience and personality
factors of the individual.
Before addressing the potential
differences, it should be understood that because of the complexity, uniqueness
and variability of human personality, it is always difficult to make general
statements about any identified “group” of people.
A same gender preference group (gay or lesbian) is not a homogenous population
any more than heterosexuals constitute a homogenous group. My own treatment or
counseling approach is tailored to the individual problems or needs of my
patients in either case. (For more information about this see About
Marvin S. Beitner, Ph.D.)
It is always critically important for a therapist to be able to identify the
relevant and essential conflicts and problem areas in order to establish an
effective treatment plan.
Sometimes the treatment of
emotional problems, such as anxiety or panic attacks or the resolution of
relationship problems does not involve significant sexual preference issues at
all.
Important elements that are common to all populations include issues of
intimacy, fear of rejection, need for love and acceptance, effective
communication, empathy, methods of conflict resolution, ability to express
feelings and problems dealing with frustration, anger, resentment and jealousy.
Unique elements that sometimes play an important role in psychological and
relationship issues in the gay and lesbian population include pressure or
rejection by parents or other relatives, specific types of childhood trauma,
cultural stereotyping, social disapproval, pressures to conceal sexual
orientation and workplace harassment or discrimination. Growing up in a
nurturing and accepting family atmosphere or living in a community, school or
work environment that is relatively accepting of the gay and lesbian life style
can minimize the significance of the differences in the treatment or counseling
approach.
Gender preference issues present certain basic differences in personal
psychological development and in the establishment of rewarding personal
relationships. With rare exceptions, the first primary emotional and
psychological attachment for every child is to a mother figure. For the
heterosexual male child, this attachment serves as the model for his later
sexual attachment to a female. On the other hand, for the heterosexual female,
there is shift from the attachment to a female to an attachment to a male. The
female’s early primary attachment to the mother is generally reflected in the
greater intimacy women have in relationships with other women, such as their
tendency to talk about personal issues and to seek emotional support from other
women. These are characteristics that men sometimes tend to lack in their
relationships with other men because of the difference in primary attachment in
infancy and early childhood. It is also reflected in the higher level of
hostility toward same gender choice males as compared to females.
For the gay man, there is a shift from the early attachment to the mother to an
attachment to another male as an adult partner. For the lesbian, the early
attachment to a female is maintained in her choice of adult partner. These
differences in the paths of psychological development represent significant
differences between heterosexual and same gender partners. These differences may
or may not be relevant to the problems that are encountered in adulthood. Part
of the job of the therapist is to identify and evaluate accurately the relevant
issues and to address those issues effectively.
Factors affecting effective psychotherapeutic treatment or counseling always
involves certain qualifications of the therapist. These include quality of
education and training, experience with relevant patient populations, personal
maturity, familiarity with cultural or sub cultural issues, ability to establish
rapport, and personal comfort with the issues and the patient.
Here
is a link to a page providing an interesting discussion of love between like
gender partners. See the following item on that page:
(4) Love is not Sex: Why Romantic Love is not limited by Gender.
